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Chasing The American Dream

September 25, 2005


Lately, I’ve been waffling back and forth with a couple of questions. Am I going to be OK and comfortable within myself if I spend the rest of my life alone, and what kind of ending will I use to finish my book? I think the two questions are related. I made a decision about the book, ending a long time ago, but I may change my mind. “Why,” you ask?

Well, my inner circle has told me if you want a successful book and movie, no one wants a sad, depressing ending. I thought about that. I thought of people walking out of the theater disappointed with the sad ending. I wanted the book/movie to be real and reflect reality. So I thought of how I could lighten it up a little and still make it real. I figured it out and changed the ending. But now I, as I said, I’m rethinking that decision.

I just saw the movie, Lost In Translation. Like Garden State, it was a “Todd” movie. Bob (Bill Murray) and Charlotte (Scarlett Johansson) are lost with their lives and relationships. They meet by chance in Tokyo. Despite their age difference, there is immediate chemistry. The audience feels the love between them although the characters never talk about it. Their bond grows stronger and you can’t help but root that the two of them will end up with each other. My heart tugged for them. I could have easily been Bill Murray. Sofia Coppola does a great job in keeping us guessing. Will they or won’t they? I’m sure most people have seen this movie by now, but for those who have not, don’t read any further or I’ll spoil the ending for you.

Happiness. Finding “The One.” Bob and Charlotte had it right in front of them; they had a grasp of it, but they couldn’t hang onto it. I’ve been there before. And like the movie ending, I’ve walked away empty-handed. But the ending worked. It ripped my heart out, but it worked. That’s why I’m rethinking the ending. "Lost" was real, it was rough, it was sad, but it worked.

I think I can live my life alone now. I’m comfortable with myself and realize that if I don’t find “her” all will not be lost. But then I see movies like “Lost” and it really makes me question my self-confidence. I guess the thing is, finding “her” and ending the chase would enrich my life tremendously and fulfill me to no end. But if I don’t, I’ll make the best out of my life and be happy with cards dealt to me. I guess Bob was thinking something along those lines, too.


  • HEY!!! it made me so happy to see your face on my blog! you are my first comment! hahah.
    anyways, we were supposed to post on whether or not we felt that we are a modernist thinker (someone who follows the rules, reads the manuels on life, and is basically someone who feels that life has a purpose that we must fufill - at least this is the context that we have been discussing in class)
    a postmodernist is someone who makes their own rules, feels that life has no purpose or meaning to it, that we are all just floating around in this universe of mass called earth, and that no one can tell them what to do.
    my post on these issues does not have to really be about how i really believe. In fact some of the stuff I wrote was simply to through any suspicion off of who I truly am. But again! made me happy that you took the time to read the mundane class work that I worked on! :)

    By Blogger just_because_i_have_to, at 3:45 PM, September 25, 2005  

  • Happiness is as a butterfly which, when pursued, is always beyond our grasp, but which if you will sit down quietly, may alight upon you.

    You'll find your way Todd Moser... Just take one day and one step at a time. Life has a funny way of working out the way its supposed to in the end...

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 5:47 PM, September 25, 2005  

  • Dear Kimo,

    I agree with anonymus. I hear your plight, but in the end it will come to you when you least expect it. Just be ready for it...


    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 7:29 PM, September 25, 2005  

  • hi todd, first time I've commented on here. I know exactly what you are going through and I've had the same conversation with myself over and over again. I still believe we will all find "the one", but you know what? If we don't, we still have fantastic lives. I'd rather be happy and single, than with the wrong person , feeling the "what am I missing" syndrome. Don't give up, just live one day at a time and do what makes you happy each day.

    By Anonymous Michelle, at 8:10 PM, September 25, 2005  

  • Thanks for the kind words, Anons.
    And yes, Michelle, I agree with you.

    By Blogger Plantation, at 8:21 PM, September 25, 2005  

  • No thanks needed Todd Moser.
    As Always Anons

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 9:41 PM, September 25, 2005  

  • Lost in Translation is one of my all time favorites. But I never really expected or wanted Bob and Charlotte to end up together. I think the beauty of that movie was that they drifted into each other's lives at just a perfect time and left an impression on each other's hearts. If we could all be so lucky to encounter people in our lives that leave lasting heart impressions.
    And, to me, that is the enrichment of life.

    (In my humble opinion) I don't think you need to find the one, but instead enjoy each and every one. And instead of trying to "make the best" realize that everything you have right now already is the best.

    By Blogger catsteevens, at 11:46 PM, September 25, 2005  

  • methinks Sofia too young to write such a complex relationship. meknows (some inside sources) that Papa Francis re-wrote a lot of Bob's and Charlotte's dialogue.

    love the ending...the moment between the two of them....the moment which none of us are allowed to share; except only from the outside. as we need to. as we all are outsiders to relationships around us.

    By Anonymous Amp, at 4:40 PM, September 26, 2005  

  • um, i don't think that they just walked away from each other. we have no idea what he whispered in her ear. i think the ending was hopeful, that even if they didn't "end up together" there was some truth between them and maybe they'll meet up again in california.

    By Blogger Amanda, at 5:50 PM, September 26, 2005  

  • you have an amazing blog. I just discovered it. ANd i Can't stop reading!

    By Blogger Anocsanamun, at 8:29 PM, September 26, 2005  

  • Yes cat, I agree.
    Amp, why did I know who you were by just reading your comment?
    Amanda, good point about the whispered conversation. In the end, we really don't know. Strangely, if you read my book, I think you'll feel the same way.
    Irene J, thank you and welcome!

    By Blogger Plantation, at 10:25 PM, September 26, 2005  

  • I don't know why you think love is going to elude you. Perhaps your downer outlook on it is one of the reasons.

    I mean, you're obviously intelligent. You write from a place many people can't even find and you are a nice looking guy. Unless you're a complete ass in person, I don't think you have to worry about finding someone.

    And I don't know that there really is a "one". You will find someone who is going to take every aspect of your being into account and may or may not like all of it, but will love you anyway. And you will feel the same about them.

    Who really knows what the secret to finding someone is? But it really does just happen. Don't try so hard trying to make it happen.

    Anyway....great blog. The writing is wonderful. When are you coming out with this damn book??? And don't change the ending....go with your guy....your first instinct. Don't change it because you think it'll be a great "mainstream" movie. You'll be catering to the lowest common denominator if you do. Go with your gut.

    By Blogger The Daily Rant, at 3:51 AM, September 27, 2005  

  • um, your gut. Go with your GUT, not your GUY. :)

    By Blogger The Daily Rant, at 3:52 AM, September 27, 2005  

  • I agree with anon. Good things come your way right when you've given up, as cheesy as it sounds. Otherwise, go with your gut. It sounds like you know how to end the book. You've started to accept yourself alone and that is what is attractive to a woman- someone who doesn't NEED them but CHOOSES to be with them.

    By Blogger girl from florida, at 8:49 PM, September 29, 2005  

  • Thanks DR for the high compliments.
    GFF, agreed. Let's see what happens now.

    By Blogger Plantation, at 1:47 AM, September 30, 2005  

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