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Chasing The American Dream

May 19, 2005

ASSMAN


Posted by Hello

Posted by Hello

I think I was somewhere near the end of the line when I was handed my digestive parts. I’ve been broken all my life and have learned to live with it. Oh, I’ve been tested, examined, poked, and prodded until the cows come home. I’ve even had surgeries, but I still have ‘problems’ in that department. I’m sure I’m in the 95th percentile or greater when it comes to time spent in the bathroom. As a result, choice of TP is key.

For the past year or so, I’ve been using Angel Soft. True, it’s nice and soft, but after about four rounds, the roll’s done. So I tried Kleenex’s Cottonelle. I didn’t like it; it didn’t have a good feel. I read on her blog that JuRiScHiCk uses Scott. She swears by it. True, those rolls last forever, but it’s like friggin’ sandpaper. Definitely out. So where’s the happy medium? Softness plus lasting? I went shopping recently and discovered that Scott now has a new Extra Soft version.



Posted by Hello

I decided to give it a trial run. Guess what? I liked it. Soft enough yet long lasting. I’m a convert. Thanks JC for the Scott tip. This could end up being a life-changing event for me.

10 Comments:

  • ODG ~ exactly as promised. Thanks for the late-night laugh.

    Glad that you're finally getting that sleep. Next stop: exercise!

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 3:16 AM, May 19, 2005  

  • You're a lunatic.

    I don't even remember how TP came up over in my neighborhood; but I don't think I posted about it, did I? Wasn't it buried somewhere in comment-land?

    Anyway, glad I could be of service, Assman! LOL

    By Blogger JuRiScHiCk, at 7:59 AM, May 19, 2005  

  • Um, ok. *speechless*

    By Blogger Sarah, at 8:19 AM, May 19, 2005  

  • and i ASSume you've heard the 'life is like a roll of toilet paper' comparison? (that wasn't really a question, was it, but the ? seemed nice) 'the closer you get to the end, the faster it goes.'

    By Blogger ropedncr, at 10:19 AM, May 19, 2005  

  • have you ever tried charmin?

    By Blogger mrhaney, at 12:50 PM, May 19, 2005  

  • I'm with Sarah. LOL

    Oh, I'm a Cottonelle girl myself. :)

    By Anonymous ESSFingers, at 1:45 PM, May 19, 2005  

  • no, no, no...Charmin is the BEST. By far!

    By Blogger Elle, at 2:11 PM, May 19, 2005  

  • damn. y'all are some spoiled mickey-fickeys. I'll be happy to use whatever.

    oh, and yea...good luck when you head out to Europe/rest of the world and expect Charmin to tickle your sensitive bums. Ha! Good luck finding a public loo, for that matter.

    (Before you get all up in my junk, I am saying this with a wry smile on my face).

    I cannot for the life of me tell you which brand I/we use in this house. But I can tell you that it works.

    By Blogger Bubbles, Ink., at 5:32 PM, May 19, 2005  

  • Recently, and I think it was on Oprah but I cannot say for sure, there was a doctor commenting about how traditional toilet paper is so bad for you. I was shocked...like what the heck are you supposed to use then??? They strongly recommended wet-ones. I think they know make wet TP, no?

    I can't even believe I had so much to say on this topic. Hahahahaha :)

    By Blogger catsteevens, at 5:37 PM, May 19, 2005  

  • Isn't it SO amazing when you find the perfect TP? I will try not to be too graphic, but I have a similar situation. It used to be Mexican, Chinese or Indian, but now it doesn't matter. I could have a bowl of cereal at a diner, it's eating away from home that does it for me. I have found Angel Soft to be my TP of choice.

    Robo is right, Grade 2 sandpaper is used in Europe. It's sturdy, tough and even comes on a roll! I would have been called the Americana crybaby so I dared not complain.

    By Blogger Mari, at 1:50 AM, May 20, 2005  

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