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Chasing The American Dream

December 28, 2004


Posted by Hello
I knew this might be coming for some time now, but I didn’t know if I should write about it, and if I did, I didn’t know how to write about it. I wanted to respect her privacy so I just kept it to myself. Plus, there were no guarantees. Maybe she’d be too busy to meet? Maybe she’d have second thoughts. After all, it’s a scary world out there with plenty of weirdos. It would take balls to actually honor her commitment and meet me. I know she’s talked about balls. Balls, balls, balls. They’re all over her blog. Did she have them? Instinctively, I knew she did and I knew she’d meet me.

Meet me, she did! And after meeting her, I got the sense that it would be OK to write. And so, yes, I was privileged and honored to have finally met the one-and-only Greek Tragedy. She calls me “Plantation.” If you remember my very first post, I gave her credit for the nickname. I reciprocated by calling her "NYNY." Anyway, I wouldn’t call it a date per se; we met and chatted over some wine and a bit of sushi. Sorry guys, nothing juicy or sexy or, in her world, Funnel Cake to report. It was totally Celery; two long-distance bloggers getting to know the person they’ve read so much about and having only conversed via email.

After playing email and phone tag for 3 days, we finally arranged to meet at Blue Martini Bar in West Palm on Sunday night, 12/26 at 7:30 pm. By all means, I should have been nervous as hell. I’ve read her posts. She can be intimidating. But I wasn’t nervous. I was confident. Must be the Garden-State-of-mind. I guess I just knew we’d have a good time, and that was the objective plain and simple.

It was about an hour’s drive to get to The Blue Martini. After I parked a ways away from it, I called her around 7:30. She said she was already there and had a nice table for us near the back. I told her not to pick up any bartenders, and that I’d be there in two minutes. As I walked up the stairs, I just felt how cool life really was during moments like this. I smiled to myself as I considered how lucky I was just to have the opportunity to be meet her.

It was a noisy place. I scanned the darkish room figuring she’d already spotted me. It took me a minute, but I finally saw her. Jeez Louise, be still my heart, I thought. My grandma Sylvia would say she looked “stunning.” NYNY said, “Come sit next to me,” so we sat side-by-side in a booth-like bench at a high-top table. I like the fact that she offered. I thought it was a nice gesture and the seating arrangement seemed comfy-cozy and nice. So for the next four hours (seemed like four minutes), we talked, we drank, we ate, and we laughed. We talked about writing, blogs, family, dating, music, food, Seinfeld, and of course, balls. Naturally, she took some photos. Neither one of us was writing notes. I’m writing this the morning after. She’s not posted yet, but I know she will (edited, she beat me to it AND she stole my title. Darn her quick wit and pen.) The list below represents the top 50 things I learned or confirmed or remembered about NYNY during out chat. I know people will rag on me thinking I’m sucking up, but I’m already used to that on her blog. Besides, I just tell it like it is. Like I said, it’s pretty Celery but nevertheless…

1. Yes, she does look like her pictures only she’s much more beautiful in person.
2. She sported her naturally curly hair which I prefer.
3. She prefers jeans on first dates.
4. Do not listen to her. She’s definitely NOT fat.
5. Have camera will travel. Her camera was by her side. It’s huge. It takes good pix as seen above.
6. Her writing notebook was in her purse, but she left the red pen at home.
7. She let me read some of the notebook entries.
8. Cliché, but she has an infectious smile with pearly whites that can light up a room.
9. She has a sweet, sexy voice.
10. I didn’t notice her write during our ‘date’ but that doesn’t mean anything.
11. She’s thoughtful and generous. She insisted on starting a tab with her card. No dice. I actually had to wrestle it away from the server.
12. She prefers finger food on first dates but manned the chopsticks for sushi and used them quite well.
13. She’s a much happier person than she writes about.
14. She does appreciate and adore her fab life.
15. She does openly talk about sex and associated sexcapades.
16. Regarding #15, she made a Freudian Slip while describing a Barenaked Ladies Holiday concert. She was expressing her disappointment at her favorite band cuz they sang X-Mas songs like “Jingle Balls.” I immediately looked downstairs to see if I left my hatch open. She describes the scene well. It was definitely a highlight and a moment I’ll not ever forget.
17. Those four-letter words on her posts are no accident; she can sling ‘em out there, f-bombs included, with the best of them.
18. Of all places, she ran into one of her best NYC friends. I jokingly accused her of having a back up plan just in case she hated me. She vehemently denied it. It became a running joke for the rest of the night.
19. Her inner circle friends, sans maybe one, do not comment on her blog.
20. By and large, she doesn’t know any of her blogger reading audience.
21. She saw the movie Spanglish and cried.
22. She’s got a memory like Rainman, “yeah, 2 minutes to Wapner.” It’s an attractive quality.
23. Her father just might be her best friend.
24. She does prefer Aussie, New Zealand wines.
25. She confirmed she’s “the world’s worst driver.”
26. Gets easily bored by my home state and misses her beloved NYC.
27. One week of family during the holidays is enough for her (and for most of us I’m sure).
28. She loves her Funnel Cake and Celery men but needs a combination.
29. She’s busy writing a book (aren't we all?). She says it adversely affects her blog writing.
30. She can do a ‘mean’ british accent.
31. She is hilarious.
32. I didn’t catch the name of her perfume, but it’s very nice.
33. She gets inundated on JDate in terms of IMs an emails.
34. She appears taller than 5’ 5”. Maybe it was the boots?
35. She loves and adores Oprah. Thought she might appear on her show, but Oprah staff considered her too famous.
36. She’s hoping to appear in Oprah’s magazine.
37. She loves to cook, more so these days for her girlfriends rather than her dates.
38. She’s planning a big 30th birthday bash (9/29/05) in The Hamptons with her girlfriends.
39. She enjoys listening to my CDs while at work.
40. She writes her posts ‘live.’ Right in the text box with minimal editing (unlike me).
41. A guy’s use of ‘man’ in a sentence is OK, i.e. Sushi rocks, man; however, overuse of ‘man’ or ‘Yo Klein, what up?’ is not acceptable.
42. She was formerly a vegetarian until 9+ years ago. Still not a huge fan of meat.
43. Her posts are point-in-time feelings. Her readers often miss the boat on this and interpret her posts as Golden Rules.
44. She’s always observing, whether you realize it or not. Makes for good writing. I’m normally the same way, but I paid her all my attention.
45. She says a lot of her dates are intimidated by her and exhibit no social skills as a result. An immediate turn-off.
46. Switched from Shiraz to Sauvignon Blanc during the night.
47. She has cold hands.
48. I did not determine whether she had cold feet. Darn.
49. Regarding my propensity to give CDs on first dates and my passion for music, she agrees with me. She likes the idea of receiving a homemade CD and admires my passion for music and does not consider that to be too picky.
50. Yes, she has balls or Chutzpah.


3. I didn’t get to meet her sister Lea.
2. I didn’t get to meet her ‘man’ Linus.
1. I didn’t get a chance to see her a 2nd time. She’s leaving for NY before New Year’s. Damn.

I had a blast. I hope NYNY had fun, too. I like her tremendously. She has a powerful presence, a magnetic personality which commands attention even without effort. As I look at my blog traffic stats, I had around 200 visitors in just about five weeks since I started this blog. Today alone, thanks to her post about me, I had over 100 visitors. Like I said, she's powerful. She’s gonna be a big star some day. She already *is* one in my book (figurative, not literal). Coming attractions for NYNY? Oh, I'd say big book, blockbuster movie, talk shows, the whole nine yards. No doubt in my mind. She’ll also meet THE ONE someday. I hope she maintains her patience and just lets it happen. Will I ever see her again? Hmm, don’t know. There’s always hope.


  • Thanks for sharing your experience with the Greek One. Your a lucky man my friend.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 8:54 AM, December 28, 2004  

  • I too cried when I saw Spanglish!

    By Blogger M, at 9:43 AM, December 28, 2004  

  • Nice. But...why the lists? Sometimes you remind me of the protagonist in Nick Hornby's "High Fidelity."

    By Blogger Bubbles, Ink., at 11:38 AM, December 28, 2004  

  • I'm amazed that you absorbed so many things about her over one meeting.

    And Robotnik, don't be dissin' the listin'. Chicks dig High Fidelity.

    By Blogger Esther Kustanowitz, at 12:30 PM, December 28, 2004  

  • Gotta rent that HF movie. Have not seen it.
    I think #22 fits me as well. "Yeah, gotta go to K-Mart. 400 Oak Street. 'Course, Oak & Burnette Cincinnati Ohio...I'm an excellent driver...uh-oh, 1 minute to Wapner..."

    By Blogger Plantation, at 1:43 PM, December 28, 2004  

  • Esther, Todd doesn't really want to be "Rob." No matter if the "chicks dig it." Believe me. I think it's great how differently women read into the book, as opposed to men. Back in '94 when I first read it, the book circulated among all my male and female friends. It was quite interesting to see the difference between the two sexes, in perception of Rob's relationship and life in general.

    And Todd...DON'T GET THE MOVIE. Read the book. The film is weak.

    By Blogger Bubbles, Ink., at 1:59 PM, December 28, 2004  

  • is the greek really sarah jessica parker using an alias?

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 3:00 PM, December 28, 2004  

  • No, I am SJP. Using Esther as an alias. Oops.

    Robotnik and I disagree. I've read both. Book was hilarious. Movie was hilarious, plus John Cusack and Jack Black. They were different, but I think both are worth a gander.

    By Blogger Esther Kustanowitz, at 4:27 PM, December 28, 2004  

  • Can anyone give me the cliff notes on HF? I'm lost. Funny SJP is mentioned. Greek and I were discussing her movie rights etc. and I asked her who she thought would play her part? Surprisingly, she hadn't thought about it. She asked me and I gave the easy answer, SJP. Anyone got any other suggestions?

    By Blogger Plantation, at 4:42 PM, December 28, 2004  

  • Wheeee! Thanks for sharing your half of the evening --sounds like a fun, v. exciting time! Love the picture of you and S.K.

    By Blogger A, at 5:55 PM, December 28, 2004  

  • You can't really give cliff's notes on High Fidelity; you miss the whole feeling of it. I disagree with Esther; after reading the book, the movie doesn't really capture the whole "male confessional" vibe that Hornby does so well. It was a valiant effort by Cusack--who made this film his pet project, it was his baby--but he can't quite get Hornby's style in the film.

    By Blogger Bubbles, Ink., at 9:33 AM, December 29, 2004  

  • Hey, what did I say? I'm skipping 30. It's my 31st birthday... silly.

    And thanks Plantation.

    By Blogger StephanieKlein, at 9:56 AM, December 29, 2004  

  • esther, do you really want to be sjp. word on the street is that she got hit by the ugly stick.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 12:28 PM, December 29, 2004  

  • Yowsa..I'm with anon. SJP looks like a combination of Maria Shriver/Skeletor/and Fire Marshall Bill.

    Back to square pegs witchous! Gwaaan!

    By Blogger Bubbles, Ink., at 12:48 PM, December 29, 2004  

  • ...and oh yea...SK, don't skip 30. 30 is great. Embrace the evil three-oh.

    By Blogger Bubbles, Ink., at 12:50 PM, December 29, 2004  

  • Oh come on, people. SJP ain't ugly. Annoying in those Gap commercials, yes. But I'm not arguing anymore.

    By Blogger Esther Kustanowitz, at 10:43 PM, December 29, 2004  

  • You are absolutely adorable Plantation! ;) Glad you two had a great time. I couldn't wait to see what you two has posted about each other. Also, I find it endearing when someone takes notice of the details of another...

    By Blogger Amanda, at 3:14 PM, December 30, 2004  

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